How does Counselling work?

Counseling can help with emotional support, behaviour and relationship management, communication  (what we think and what we say), goal setting and objective, identifying and resolving problems and solutions, promoting empowerment and self-esteem that people lose during separation and divorce.

Today Life's Disorders

In today’s society with its stressful fast pace, there is so much that is expected from us in every area of our lives. Family, work, and friends - the demands never end! And you are expected to do it all and do it well. 

It has been estimated that in their lifetime about one in five Canadians will suffer from depression or an anxiety disorder. That means, if you look at your immediate family, it is likely that one of you will experience these symptoms. In the past decade, great strides have been made in understanding these disorders and how to treat them.

• Conflict
• Chaotic atmosphere
• Anger
• Disobedience
• Emotional pain
• Concentration & Discipline
• Behavioural problems

Divorce can trigger:

• Chronic Anger
• Depression
• Anxiety
• Developmental Delays
• Eating Disorders

Often parent's self-esteem take a huge hit, and their coping mechanisms are stretched thin. When tension, hostility, anger, frustration, and sadness are in the forefront of a divorce, children are likely to have a harder time dealing with the separation and change.

These kinds of feelings are very powerful and, when left unchecked, have the potential to be hurtful to the children. Angry, hurt feelings towards a spouse may unintentionally be displaced onto children. When these things happen, the children are caught in the middle and their needs tend to be overlooked. Many children in this position need something to help them deal with the separation and loss elicited from the divorce and the hostility between their parents; they need the chance to talk with a safe someone outside the family. When parents are too caught up in their own emotions and preoccupied with the ex-spouse, the children's need’s can be missed.

Divorce is probably in the top two stressors a child can experience in life along with death. Wise parents understand that there is tremendous value in navigating these times with as little damage as possible. Both the parents' feelings and the children’s feelings are valid and need to be expressed in healthy ways so they can be better managed. In this way, parents can be sure that their feelings are not overshadowing the needs of their children. This is where our professional counsellors come along side to process, ground and center both parent and child in order to transition well.

Children and Divorce

The potential negative effects of divorce on children, has been very well documented over the last forty years. A light spirited child can withdraw to an introverted insecure little person. Stress uncared for can trigger more serious issues of depression and anxiety.

Most separations and divorce are tough. They are tough with good reason. There are many losses. Just a few are:

• Loss of hopes and dreams
• Loss of a life partner
• Loss of quality time with children
• Loss of economic resources
• Loss of emotional support
• Loss of choice
• School & Work Achievement
• Self-esteem & Confidence

What is Anxiety?

When a person has an anxiety disorder, it interferes with their ability to function normally on a daily basis. Anxiety disorders can cause teens to suffer from intense, long-lasting fear or worry, in addition to other symptoms.

Alcohol, Drugs and Depression

A lot of depressed people, especially teenagers, also have problems with alcohol or other drugs. (Alcohol is a drug too.) Sometimes the depression comes first and people try drugs as a way to escape it. In the long run, drugs or alcohol just make things worse. Other times, the alcohol or other drug use comes first, and depression is caused by:

• the drug itself
• withdrawal from it or
• the problems that substance abuse causes.

And sometimes you can't tell which came first. The important point is that when you struggle with either of these problems, the sooner you get treatment, the better. Unaddressed, these problems can lead to even greater trouble, like addiction or job failure or relationship fractures. You have to be honest about both problems - first with yourself and then with someone who can help you get into treatment. It's the only way to get better and stay better.

Understanding Anxiety Disorders

Anxiety disorders are conditions that involve unrealistic fear and worry. Anxiety disorders are very common. Many people have anxiety disorders. Many have feelings of fear, worry, panic, or intense stress that can sometimes make it hard to get through the day.

Anxiety can also interfere with things as basic as sleep, concentration and appetite, not to mention the ability to enjoy life and relax. The good news is that anxiety disorders are very treatable.

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 How to Handle Anxiety?

Anxiety is a natural part of life and most of us experience it from time to time. The word "anxiety" usually refers to worry, concern, stress or nervousness. For most teens, anxiety is limited to particular situations such as tests, important dates (like the prom) or driving lessons.

Feeling anxious can sometimes be a good thing. Anxiety can actually help you by motivating you to prepare for a big test or by keeping you on your toes in potentially dangerous situations. Occasional anxiety isn't something to be concerned about.

Anxiety is a natural part of life and most of us experience it from time to time. The word "anxiety" usually refers to worry, concern, stress or nervousness. For most teens, anxiety is limited to particular situations such as tests, important dates (like the prom) or driving lessons.

Feeling anxious can sometimes be a good thing. Anxiety can actually help you by motivating you to prepare for a big test or by keeping you on your toes in potentially dangerous situations. Occasional anxiety isn't something to be concerned about.